new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
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