I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
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