Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
