I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
too bad you live with your parents still
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
