ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
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