Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize
