I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
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