There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
