My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize
