I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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