In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
Randomize
