She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Randomize
