I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
