scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
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