That's intense
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
