I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Randomize
