Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
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