the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
