Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
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