I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
