singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
