It's Friday. Sex?
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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