i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
