Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
I want to stick my p in your. b.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Randomize
