I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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