It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Randomize
