do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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