Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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