its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future�
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
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