so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Randomize
