i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.�
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
