Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
It's never too late to be topless.
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
