Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Randomize
