we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
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