watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
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