i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
