Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
ugly people sure do ruin things
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
