We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
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