It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
