I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
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