I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize
