is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
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