What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Randomize
