Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
