jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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