what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
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