when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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