he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
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