the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
