I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
